quizage

Get one of your own! by Drunken Hero Stalkers are twats. A cautionary tale from inteligrrl. phour is stalking inteligrrl phour’s REAL name : Alba Caldwell phour’s REAL DOB : 22nd November 1987 Height :174 cm Weight : 106.0 kg phour has dreamt about you : 25 times phour became interested in you : 17th October 2004 phour’s latest dream about you phour and inteligrrl make passionate love on a condom strewn beach in Belgium to the sound of George Michael’s Careless Whisper playing in the distance. This is how phour describes your relationship behind your back ‘I don’t want to be just good friends. I want to be with her forever. To death to us part and all that.’ phour’s been stealing stuff from your house too. phour seems to get a thrill from continually stealing your toothbrushes. It is rumoured that phour uses them to scratch their ass. They’ve even started modifying their body for you phour had their nipples pierced to show you the true depths of their neverending love for you. They sent the following message to you in a Valentines If I can’t have you, nobody can darling. I’d advise you to committ these words to memory. The Police No. calls to the police : 24 times Your Last Call to The Police "Police!?!? phour’s in my backyard again stealing clothes off of our washing line. This is the 10th time in a week for fucks sake." phour’s Police File phour poses no real threat to society at large, unless of course your name is inteligrrl. In that case, you are royally fucked. Testimonies about phour kessie - Suicidal wreck ‘I’m gonna kill inteligrrl for being such a snide fucker. Who does it think it is? I’d love to give her a right slap in the chops! phour is a brilliant person.’ lunarennui - Overweight cult comedian ‘I’m tired of hearing about of these allegations about phour. inteligrrl is a demented twat. Ignore her.’ wikdsushi - Fathers goats ‘Fucking hell! This is hilarious for all the wrong reasons. inteligrrl should really be in hospital receiving X-rays to the head.’ cybele_san - Eats everything. ‘phour’s obsession with breastfeeding should have acted as an insight into their warped mind. I can’t believe I overlooked it for so long. Jesus.’