Trolley horror...

[inteligrrl]

On my way home today I was riding the trolley and as usual minding my own business (i.e. reading a book) I glance up to see what stop we're at and I see the guy across from me jacking himself off under his newspaper. *shudders* my virgin eyes didn't need to see that.

And it's not so much that I mind that people masturbate as a general rule (on the contrary, I think it's a good stress reliever. 'make porn, not war' and all that) but it's just so unsanitary to do it on the trolley, not to mention I'd rather not have to look up from Jane Austen to see a big, black, one-eyed trouser snake, it gave me quite a start.

*sighs* gotta love the public transit system. you never know what you'll see.

p.s. It has to be mentioned that when I walked off the trolley I decided that that was it! All men are perverts and the only one who can have a chance with me is Ewan McGreggor. I have since relented and I am now willing to consider men with doctorate degrees. But that's it. And even they will have to sit through a lengthy interview process. That's right, I'm inflicting my trauma on them. If they have a problem with it they can go hunt down the guy in the blue jumper and take it up with him. I will make men pay for the mental trauma I suffered.

*pets her poor Jane Austen book*

Comments

[cabbitlover.livejournal.com]

That's great, you just don't hear about stuff like that in little old Silver City. The occasional bouncing car, but that's it. Oh, been meaning to ask you, have you seen Strange Bedfellows?

[phour.livejournal.com]

That is a bit of a shock. Jane Austin, if I recall right, is a bit against little bishops in a turtleneck in public... heck, sometimes I even think she is against them in private! But you brought some amusement to my day for having read this. Thank you!

[booksofmagic.livejournal.com]

Oh my...I've never seen such things but I've heard of them second-hand (a friend of a friend once saw...). Good-luck in finding a good doctorate'd non-trolley-wanker. =)

[amber-n-w.livejournal.com]

Jenn. S. can tell you a similar story about a Braum's here in AR, she also was quite traumatized. Though I don't think it put her off of all men, just the ones who aren't dangerous looking good boys with an excellent sense of humor, lots of patience and a yard big enough to put in a pool.

[(Anonymous)]

Males are dolts, i'm completly full of self loathing, i would get a sex change if it was't for somone.... who well... likes me the way i am.