There's been a lot of heartbreak in bandom over the last year, which is sad, but understandable as we're dealing with real people who have free will and the ability to screw themselves up. I've been sad, and people I follow have been sad about some of the developments, and then I remembered - I already know how to deal with this. I've learned this lesson before.
I don't know if this will help, but let me tell you my short story of coping with fandom woe: I'd been big into X-Files fandom and a few others for a couple of years before I stumbled into Harry Potter. I came in right after book 4 came out, and I just fell in love with the series. I loved the characters, and the fic, and most of all I loved the books. It owned my heart in a way that no fandom had before. Now JKR took a couple years of break between books at this point, so fandom wrote the rest of the story. It was mad fun, and we were all in a state of high anticipation for the eventual fifth book.
Then the fifth book came out.
All of a sudden these characters I loved were different, to the point that it almost seemed out of character when compared to earlier books. I didn't like it, but I could have dealt with that alone - but then I hit the end, and JKR killed Sirius. I know the later books really undermined the character of Sirius, but I was devastated - to me, this was the death of Harry's hope for a happy ending. Sirius really loved Harry, he was the strongest link to his parents, and his best hope for ever having a family that actually loved him. Not only that, but it destroyed all the happy endings the fans had created, moving the entirety of the established fannon a step to the left from cannon.
And the thing is, I liked the fandom timelines better than that of cannon. Harry Potter taught me the most important lesson of my fanish existence - that it is possible, and often less heart breaking, to make fannon your own cannon. In my head, books 5, 6, and 7 aren't what really happened, they're an alternate universe. I don't have a set story in my head for what really happened, just a conglomeration of ideas pulled from my favorite fic universes - but they all end the way I want them to. I approach bandom the same way. While I want the best for the people of bandom, it's in an abstract way, because in my head it's already turned out okay. Maybe there's some angst, hurt/comfort, or the occasional visit by unicorns, but in the end, somewhere down the road, I know they all end up friends and live happily ever after. That's the cannon I choose, and everything else is just AU.